What To Do If You Lose Your Job

I am not an economist. I am not a career counselor. I don't have a degree in anything. My advice is from experience. I worked in sales, customer service and health benefits during my career days. I am now a housewife. 

But I am a housewife who has been through lay-offs. His and mine. We have lost a small business. We have had one or the other unemployed for over a year. This was when we had kids at home and car payments. I know what it is like. So, I am going to give you what I've got, based on personal experience. I don't know everything but I know some things. Here they are:

If you or your significant other lose a job, you will go through all the same things you experience in a crisis; shock, disbelief, denial, depression, acceptance. You know the drill. I am sure there is some acronym for this but I am not a psychologist either so I don't know an acronym for it.

Once you gain your composure, there are some steps you need to take IMMEDIATELY!

* Call everyone you owe money to. Tell them you lost your job but you would like to work with them to keep  your credit rating intact. Negotiate. Ask to speak to a supervisor. Do EVERYTHING YOU CAN to negotiate a lower payment or a grace period of no payments. This is very important in these times because many potential employers check credit ratings in the hiring process. Even though it isn't your fault, it might keep you from being hired somewhere.

Beg if you must. If you have been a reliable risk in the past, they should work with you.

* Analyze all your spending. Sit down and go through your bills, receipts, ATM charges - ANYTHING you spend money on. Start cutting. Cut till it hurts. Cut cable. Cut call waiting. Cut your cell bill to a cheaper plan. No more trips to Starbucks. Brew your coffee at home. Rent movies or check them from the library. Cut dinners out. My friend Tara told me they had started having a weekly game night with friends instead of dinner out. Chop anywhere you can. Call your insurance company and see if you can get a cheaper deal on auto or home owner's insurance. Wash your own car. Get cheap. Really, really cheap.

* Call or communicate with all your business and personal contacts. Tell them you lost your job. Ask them to let you know if they hear of something. Be specific about what you want in a job. If you want anything you can get, say so. If you have a particular type of position, say so. Ask them if they know anyone who might be able to help you. Ask permission to use their name when you contact someone they referred you to. Send them your resume. Don't bug them but touch base every month you are out of work with a quick note or email that says, 'hey, just letting you know I am still looking. Thanks .' If you find a job, send a note saying, 'thanks for your help and support. I got a job with XYZ Company.' Put the word out at church, kids activities, clubs, etc. Let people know what you do and what you are looking for.

* Critique your credentials. Is there some certification or class that would improve your chances? Is there another area or field that your job skills could cross over to? Ask friends to look at your skills, experience and credentials. Brainstorm with them for new ways to use your experience. If you have been in energy production, could that convert into some other field? Could you get certified in safety and expand your marketability? Can you convert what you do into a field in infrastructure or Eco-friendly energy? Are you knowledgeable enough in your field to write articles for Industry periodicals? Try to think outside the box.

* Make more than one resume. Try to gear a resume for different applications. A resume in Marketing can be geared toward different types of media or for project management. Ask for help from friends in different industries. What do they like to see in a resume. Educate yourself on power words and phrases. Use you personal accomplishments as your experience. Showing up for work is not an accomplishment (well, maybe it is but not for this purpose) but finding a way to save the company money by switching to a different product or doing a task in a different way. Raising sales figures with a creative approach is an accomplishment. Increasing productivity in some way is an accomplishment. Zero net loss (balancing your cash drawer) is an accomplishment. Safety awards, employee awards, promotions (even in name only) are accomplishments. You are good. Tell them about it.

* Make your job search a job. Assign yourself work time and down time. If you are going to job search Monday through Thursday from 9-4, get dressed and show up for work at those times. Get on the computer and research jobs and companies. Work on your resume. Go to Temp agencies and apply there. (You can get some good jobs at a Temp agency. If the company you work for likes you, they just may hire you. Easy foot in the door.) Work on improving your skills. Take a class online or go to the local Unemployement office for information on free workshops in your area. Check out the Adult School or classes at the Community College. Work on getting work. Then, on you 'day off' don't work (unless someone calls you with a job interview or something). Take in a video or read a good book. Barbeque with friends. Take a jog, work on a hobby. Whatever floats your boat. Just don't ignore the 'me' time.

* Cut everyone some slack. I can tell you that a lay-off can stress the best of relationships. Women want to talk, talk, talk. Hash, re-hash and hash some more. Men want to think, stew, hole up and work on it internally. This can cause conflict. Wife is blah, blah, blahhing while man is thinking, thinking, stewing and pretty soon one or the other will scream, "What is WRONG with you?"

Try not to do that. Try to understand that this won't be easy on any level. When the wife is blah, blah, blahhing; hug her and tell her anyone would be lucky to get her for an employee. You picked her, why wouldn't everyone?  When the husband is think, think, stewing; hug him, give him a plate of hot wings and tell him that he is the man of your dreams and anyone would be lucky to get him for an employee. After all, you picked him; why wouldn't everyone?

* Talk to your kids. Kids think the world revolves around them. Kids think everything in the world happens because of them, good or bad. Be honest but be vague. They do not need to know that any day now the car will be repossessed. They do need to know that Mommy or Daddy isn't going to work for awhile. They are going to see that things are not the same at home. Try to do things with them that are fun and cheap. Have a family movie night every week. Take trips to the library. Go for walks to the park to picnic. Instead of making it out to be bad, find good things. Do your best not to talk negatively in front of your kids. Teenagers are different. I think you should be pretty straight with them. They get it. Little ones, not so much.

* Get help if you need it. If you feel like depression is taking hold of you, get medical help. I suffered from severe depression after a divorce and a job loss. It felt like a cloak of darkness covered me and I couldn't get out. I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to eat. I couldn't make a decision on the simplest level. Medication will help you feel well enough to deal with your issues and move on. It is not being "ON DRUGS". If you had high blood pressure, medication could help. Why should depression be any different.

This is a rough economy. People are scared. It's understandable. It's okay to feel however you feel. Rational or not. Just try to focus on what you have instead of what you do not. These are the times when we should be turning to family and friends. These are the times that we should be re-newing our minds, bodies and our faiths. These are the times when we should be helping each other, family, friends, and neighbors. 

After all, it's PEOPLE that matter most.

Blessings,

Mary